Highway To Armageddon Read online

  I tell the girls my findings. I’m not at all surprised when Boom Boom says, “There’s no way in hell we’re going to Dresden.”

  “But why would we go to Brigham Young?” Dorothy asks. “We’ll be backtracking. Dresden is on the way to Alaska.”

  “I take it you ain’t never heard of Dresden, huh?” Krystal asks with a mouthful of dried apricots.

  “Not really,” Dorothy says coolly. “We didn’t learn a lot of geography while working our corners.”

  I cringe at Dorothy’s remark. It makes me so sick to think of all the abuse she and others like her have endured over the years. It almost makes me want to go on a pimp killing spree. Maybe I’ll do that after we nab Mikhail. I know Boom Boom will want to tag along.

  “Dresden is a settlement full of evil, racist Neo-Nazis and Ku Klux Klansmen,” I explain to Dorothy. “A lot of the people who live there are sympathetic to the Neo-Nazis that rule Europe. It’s a horrible place. Every non-white person unlucky enough to stumble through Dresden’s gates is brutally lynched.”

  “Oh my gosh, that’s horrible,” Dorothy says. “I can’t believe the government would allow such a place to exist.”

  “It’s not quite that simple,” Boom Boom says. I’m glad to see her talking again, even if it is just so she can show off her smarts. “The government leaves Dresden alone to keep the peace with America’s blossoming Neo-Nazi movement. Just like what happened in Europe, a lot of white Americans are feeling threatened by the large number of non-Aryan immigrants flooding into Canada and Alaska. The Neo-Nazis hate the fact that all these darker-skinned people are ‘stealing their jobs’ and ‘taking their land’. Klaxton feels it’s best to allow all the Neo-Nazis in Dresden to live as they please. It’s a way for her administration to keep their vitriolic, genocidal views contained to the smallest space possible. If she were to crack down on them, that would ignite a devastating racial civil war. Allowing Dresden to exist is considered the lesser of two evils, basically.”

  “That still doesn’t make it right,” Dorothy protests. I notice everyone has stopped eating, even Krystal. Something about genocide causes people to lose their appetite.

  “I mean, they just lynch people and the government lets them get away with it?” Dorothy asks, still trying to wrap her mind around such an injustice.

  “It’s not that far-fetched of a concept,” Boom Boom says, assuming her slightly-annoying ‘professorial’ tone. “There was widespread lynching in the United States during the early 20th century. And of course lynching was wide-spread throughout Europe during World War 2, the era that today’s Neo-Nazi celebrate and revere. It’s rumored thousands of non-Aryans and so-called ‘undesirables’ have been murdered in Dresden over the years, including Jews, Muslims, Hispanics, blacks, homosexuals, people with mental disabilities, gypsies…. The list goes on and on. The government turns a blind eye and feigns ignorance on the genocide, all in the name of keeping peace with America’s massive racist population.”

  “But where do the Nazis find all these people to lunch?” Dorothy asks. “Surely no non-white person would visit Dresden.”

  “I sure as hell wouldn’t!” Krystal hollers.

  “Dresden will occasionally send hunting parties into the surrounding woods,” Boom Boom explains. “Except these hunters don’t hunt animals… they hunt people. More specifically, non-Aryans. Usually they track down immigrants on their way to Northern Canada and Alaska. Most of the immigrants are simply fleeing the deserts of the South. The hunters bring the non-Aryans back to their settlement and lock them in internment camp until it’s time for a ‘lynching party’. It’s brutal, it’s horrific, and unfortunately it’s passively endorsed by our very own government.”

  Poor Dorothy looks like she’s about to puke. Boom Boom surely doesn’t help matters when she says, “As bad as Dresden sounds, it’s nothing compared to the holocaust going on over in Europe. It’s rumored tens of millions have died over there. Entire nations of immigrants from Africa and the Middle East, wiped off the face of the Earth because of the color of their skin and their religions. It makes the genocides of the 20th century pale in comparison.”

  Dorothy’s face turns sickly green. She gulps several times, I guess to keep down the bile rising up her throat.

  I stand up and stretch my aching back. “Well gang, we’ve wasted enough time. We have a long hike ahead of us. I checked the forecast and it’s supposed to storm later. The sooner we reach Brigham Young, the better.”

  Everyone gets up and grabs their things. I make sure to sling my blanket over my shoulder. I highly doubt we reach Brigham Young before nightfall, especially since we’ll be hiking through rugged terrain. I would bet we’ll be spending another uncomfortable night outdoors. Hopefully we can at least find a cave or some abandoned hut to protect us from the coming rain.

  Before we leave, Dorothy stops to kiss Sally’s grave. “Goodbye, old friend,” she whispers.

  Boom Boom stops to touch the cross. “We will never forget you, Sally. Never.”

  She wraps her arm around Dorothy’s trembling shoulders and leads her out of the campsite. Krystal and I follow after them.

  The hike is tougher than I expected. We have to navigate steep hills and travel around winding streams. By the middle of the afternoon my goggles say we’re still 24 miles away from Brigham Young, even though we hiked way more than six miles. The harsh terrain is forcing us to go two steps to the left in order to take one step forward. I feel bad for Krystal; she’s sweating and cursing up a storm, talking about how this is not worth $25 million. I’m beginning to agree with her.

  The most hair-raising part of our odyssey occurs about an hour later. We just finish hiking up a pretty steep hill when a low, feral growl freezes us in our tracks.

  Boom Boom points off into the distance. “Look, a grizzly bear!”

  Sure enough, there’s a momma grizzly near some bushes, with her two cubs behind her. My blood runs cold as she locks eyes on us and bares her teeth.

  “Crap, what do we do?” I whisper.

  “Remain calm,” Boom Boom says. “No sudden moves.”

  Dorothy peeks out from behind my back. “Aren’t we supposed to play dead?”

  “I think that only works with black and brown bears,” Boom Boom replies. “Grizzles are more aggressive… I think. Hang on, lemme check online.”

  “Yeah, like the ferocious momma grizzly is going to give us a chance to look up her temperament,” I say sarcastically.

  Krystal suddenly barges up the hill, huffing and puffing.

  “My heart can’t take much more of this,” Krystal hollers for the whole world to hear. “Y’all know I have high blood pressure.”

  The momma grizzly’s growling grows louder. She must find Krystal annoying, too. I fear Momma Bear won’t be as diplomatic in getting her to shut up as we are.

  Boom Boom clamps her hand over Krystal’s big mouth. “Shh, be quiet!”

  Krystal pries Boom Boom’s hand off her face. “Why I gotta be quiet? We’re in the middle of the damn forest. I… oh look! Some bears!”

  “Yeah, bears,” I say. “So shush!”

  Krystal ignores me and continues walking toward them. “Aww, look at the babies! They’re so cute! They look like little teddy bears.”

  “Except teddy bears won’t bite your head off,” Boom Boom points out.

  “What are you talking about, Boom Boom?” Krystal says, continuing to get dangerously close to the bears. “They’re not going to…”

  The momma bear lets loose a ferocious roar that sends birds in the surrounding treetops fluttering to safety. Krystal stumbles backwards and utters, “Oh crap.”

  The bear charges toward Krystal, snarling and gnashing her teeth.

  Krystal spins around and hustles toward us. Her face is as white as a sheet.

  “Help! Don’t let that crazy bitch eat me! Help!!”

  Krystal barges past us and dashes down the hill.

  “Smooth, Krystal,” I grumble, grabbing
my gun.

  I really don’t want to shoot the bear, but I also don’t want my guts gnawed on while I’m semi-conscious. I aim my gun at the momma’s head and begin applying pressure on the trigger when Boom Boom shouts, “Wait, I got this!”

  Boom Boom steps forward and hurls a flash grenade. The grenade hits the ground right in front of the bear and releases a blinding burst of brilliant white light. Boom Boom’s desperate move catches me off guard; I end up looking right at the blast. Even with my shades on I’m temporarily blinded. Everything turns white and fuzzy.

  Boom Boom follows up by heaving a tear-gas grenade. The tear gas explodes all over the bear. She gags and coughs before running off in the opposite direction. The cubs sprint after her.

  I fall to my knees and rub my eyes. I’m going to be seeing spots for hours.

  Boom Boom kneels down to check on me. “Sorry about that, Lance.”

  “It’s okay,” I say, standing back up. “I really didn’t want to kill the bear. I’m glad you scared her off.”

  Krystal peeks her head over the top of the hill. “Is the bear gone?”

  “Yes, Krystal,” Boom Boom says with a sigh. “Thanks for having our backs.”

  Krystal saunters over and says, “Hey, if y’all ever need help taking down an army of gangbangers, I’ll be right behind you. But man-eating bears are a different story. So are spiders. I hate spiders.”

  A flash of light streaks across the sky, followed by a crackling, thunderous BOOM. A few birds fly overheard, spooked by the thunder. Giant drops of rain splatter on my head. I look up at the rapidly darkening sky. The storm is now upon us. Fantastic.

  “Aw man, this rain is gonna mess up my wig,” Krystal groans, covering her hair with her hands.

  “We better get a move on,” Boom Boom says. “According to the radar, this storm is going to get way worse before it gets better.”

  Boom Boom turns out to be a modern-day Nostradamus. Barely a few minutes later we get drenched by freezing, gusting sheets of rain. We become completely soaked within a matter of seconds. Boom Boom and Krystal still have their cowboy jackets, but Dorothy and I are only wearing our regular clothes. Dorothy has it way worse than me, though; she’s still wearing her skimpy outfit from the Wild West. I give her my blanket, which she gratefully drapes over her head and shoulders. It doesn’t do her much good, though. The water soaks through the fabric as if it were a flimsy rag.

  We trudge through the muddy forest in silence. There’s not really much to say. What are we supposed to do, complain about the weather? At times the rain comes down so hard that it feels like we’re drowning. I keep my head down so I can breathe without inhaling water.

  Boom Boom spends the rest of our miserable hike trying to hack back into our database. She tries every password combination she can think of. Arrow, Arrow1, Arrow2, Arrow3, all the way up to Arrow1,000. She also tries different variations of Machete, Boom Boom, Red, bow, names of criminals Arrow helped take down, names of authors he apparently likes, but nothing seems to work.

  After spending a few hours listening to

  Boom Boom curse under her breath, I finally say, “Give it up, Firecracker. Arrow must have picked some crazy password with a bunch of numbers and symbols, like dollar signs, asterisks, and ampersands.”

  Boom Boom growls and swats at a low-lying branch. “I just can’t believe I fell for his tricks! I’m so stupid!”

  “Hey now,” I say, struggling to be heard over a lengthy rumble of thunder. I have to wipe my goggles with my sleeve every few seconds just so I can see. “We all make mistakes. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

  I’m trying to keep Boom Boom calm because I need her at her best if we’re going to get our mission back on track. Krystal doesn’t help matters when she says, “You sure have been making a lot of mistakes lately, Boom Boom. First you lost our car in Cincinnati, and now you lost our database. You used to be ‘Little Ms. Perfect’. What happened?”

  “Krystal, please shut up,” I say.

  A gust of wind sweeps through the valley. It’s the strongest one yet. My goggles say it’s blowing over 60 miles an hour.

  “We really need to find some shelter!” I shout over the howling wind.

  “But we’re still 23 miles from Brigham Young,” Boom Boom shouts back. “At this pace it will take us days to reach the settlement.”

  “I know, Boom Boom, but have you checked out the radar?” I holler. I have to spit out a mouthful of water every time I talk. “This is a monster storm, with tornadic activity. We need to…”

  I stop when a terrifying sound rings across the valley, sending shivers down my spine.

  “What is that?” Dorothy asks as the rumbling sound gets louder and louder.

  “It almost sounds like… a train,” Krystal says.

  Boom Boom gasps. “Holy crap, it just popped up on the radar. There’s a freaking tornado headed straight toward us!”

  “A tornado!” Dorothy cries. She’s on the verge of a full-blown panic attack. I think I am, too.

  “Everyone remain calm,” I say, even though my trembling voice gives me away as a hypocrite.

  I go on the internet and pull up a geographical map of the surrounding area. I immediately spot a cave a few hundred yards away. The radar indicates a tornado will sweep through this very area in less than a minute. We need to haul ass.

  “C’mon, guys, follow me!” I grab Dorothy’s arm and pull her toward the cave. Boom Boom and Krystal hustle after us. The wind blasts us in the back, nearly lifting us off the ground. My goggles say the wind gusts are now over 80 miles an hour. The outer edges of the tornado have already arrived.

  Even with all the rain and debris flying around, I catch a glimpse of the cave off in the distance. I glance behind me and nearly piss myself at the sight of a monstrous, dark-gray funnel cloud barreling down on top us. The rotating winds snap trees like toothpicks and send them hurtling through the air. It sounds like there’s a locomotive driving through my skull. The intense shift in air pressure causes my ears to pop, which only increases the deafening noise.

  “Hurry guys!” I scream, running as fast as I possibly can. I’m impressed and thankful everyone seems to be keeping pace, even Krystal. Nothing like a life or death situation to transform you into an Olympic sprinter.

  My goggles now say the gusts blowing at our backs are in excess of 100 miles per hour. Dorothy actually starts to lift off the ground. I yank her back down and keep running.

  The four of us dive into the cave just as a tree falls over the entrance. We all slam onto the damp ground and roll into the center of the cave. I groggily sit up and check on my friends. No one seems seriously injured.

  I peek out the front of the cave and watch in horror at the deadly force of nature we just barely avoided. The massive tree that fell over the entrance has already blown away, giving us an unobstructed view of the tornado. All I see is a dark, swirling mass full of debris. The ‘train’ sound shakes the walls of the cave, inciting fears of a cave-in.

  Entire trees fly past the entrance, showing just how powerful the tornado is. My goggles tell me the winds at the center of the tornado are in excess of 200 mph! It’s a freaking 4F tornado! The government really needs to stop with all their geo-engineering. Ever since they started creating artificial storms to end the drought, powerful tornados have erupted all across the planet, killing thousands.

  A branch flies through the cave like a missile, missing Boom Boom’s head by mere inches. We all flatten against the wall and crouch down, shielding our heads with our hands.

  It seems to take forever for Mother Nature’s freight train to pass through. The tornado must have swerved to the left at the last second; otherwise I’m sure more debris would have blown into the cave, ripping us to shreds.

  Dorothy spends the duration of the tornado with her fingers in her ears and her eyes clenched shut. I rub her back in an attempt to keep her calm.

  Krystal clasps her hands together and mumbles something. At first I
don’t know what she’s doing (I can’t hear over the wind), but I eventually figure out she’s praying. It’s something she doesn’t do very often. While I wouldn’t consider any of us overly-religious, Krystal is a bit more spiritual than me and Boom Boom. It’s probably because of her deeply religious grandmother.

  The winds finally die down a bit, and the train sound gets quieter and quieter. I stand up and stretch.

  “I think the worst is over, guys.”

  I make my way toward the mouth of the cave. Boom Boom shouts, “Lance, get back here! There might be another twister on the way!”

  I wave her off. “The radar shows the storm is moving south.”

  The rain is still coming down pretty hard so I don’t step all the way outside. I do peer out, however, and I’m shocked at what I find: complete devastation for as far as the eye can see. If the U.S. and China were ever foolish enough to launch a nuclear war, this would be the result.

  The tornado carved a half-mile wide path of destruction through the forest. Giant, 100-foot tall trees were uprooted and tossed aside as if they were popsicle sticks. Everywhere the twister touched down looks completely flattered. Off in the distance the tornado continues its unrelenting rampage, plucking trees from the soil and tossing them hundreds of yards away. The dark gray twister spirals way up into the sky, connected to the black clouds that control it like some sinister puppeteer. Even moving away from us the twister looks frightening.

  Boom Boom appears by my side. “My God. The destruction…”

  She looks out at the retreating twister and gasps. “Wow.”

  “Wow indeed.”

  “It would almost be beautiful if it wasn’t so annihilative,” Boom Boom says. “We stand there for another minute or so, watching Mother Nature’s equivalent of a nuclear bomb snaking through the forest like an out-of-control top.

  A bolt of lightning slams into the ground about 100 yards from us. A crack of thunder follows a split-second later.